Poetry Submission

I ended up having a little down time today which was much needed and very unexpected. I discovered in one of my favorite LDS Facebook groups (The Exponent) that there was a request for poetry submissions and so I have happily spent the morning hunting through my miscellaneous scraps and posts of poetry for some submissions. I have submitted my chosen poetry and have posted my choices below. All have been published previously on this blog and I have linked each poem to the original post. This was a bit of fun today and it felt wonderful to share some of my work. I needed this opportunity today.


The Spirit of Peace

Eyes closed, breathe deep

legs crossed, head bowed

Feel the world around you

the breeze that lovingly envelopes you

the warmth that seeps through your skin

the spirit that whispers to your heart

Whisper your needs, hear him answer

Give him your heart, feel his love

Breathe in, clear your mind

the thoughts that bring you down

the worries that fret your soul

the fears that trap your agency

Listen with all your being

Be open, be loving, be joyful

Be you!


The Unexpected Change

Relief, sweeping relief

the surprising news comes

My heart feels lighter, suspended

the fear is dissolving, the air more clear

Tears pour down with gratitude

Nothing has changed... just one small tweak

yet the whole world is righted

moving forward feels possible, even doable

Thank you, Father... thanks for hearing

the prayer I didn't dare dream … or whisper


Night Swimming

A click and the darkness flows

quickly to fill all space

cool sheets press against my cheek

arms flayed, spread out

feet dangling in the air

a slight breeze moves the air

leaving ripples of breath and hair

floating, gliding, sinking in the deep

and even though my physical sense hasn't moved

hasn't budged, hasn't twitched

I sense the waves of exhaustion flow in

the riptide of need to rest, to forget, to lessen

A whirlpool of darkness, soft voices and purring

And you sink down, down into the abyss

the light patterns on your lids begin to fade

from white to green and blue

and suddenly you're gone and only spiritual remains

The tide flows by and pulls you in.....

… the hamster on the wheel

… the fears of your heart

… the images of film explored

… the joy of memories relived

… the revelation of things to come

together they flow, merge and tug your mind

As they merge, your breathing slows

yet your mind is full of visions

sometimes you backstroke and float unaided

and sometimes your fears win

Suddenly, the blue turns light

the darkness quickly fading

the movies gone, the images dissolve

only the emotions remain, dripping off

My eyes crash open, appendages start to twitch

consciousness and self break free

A stretch, a yawn... and the images are gone

A day of possibilities beyond

and yet I smile and think of evening

for the joys of night swimming


To Be

To dream is to stretch your soul

... to reach out of your reality to a new place

... to hope for future peace

To plan is to stretch your mind

... to focus on the changes that must be

... to hold onto a goal with purpose

To try is to acknowledge possibility

... of both failure and success

... to move onward anyway

To grow is to reach forth

... to know that to gain may cause pain

... that through adversity, we gain strength

To love is to believe

... to know that the Father loves us

... to have faith in ourselves

... to be


Journey of Recovery

Why so many challenges

I think as I fall

The fall doesn't hurt

The impact breaks all

I struggle to stand

The earth starts to shift

My heart feels torn

My mind feels adrift

How to recover – I do not know

This massive pain

Will it help me grow?

As I recover and life goes on...

Will I feel safe?

Will I ever feel strong?

I will stand up and try to pray

To think nice thoughts throughout the day

And watch for the light that shows the way

To charity, to life, to love secure

All I need is to but endure.


Please feel free to leave feedback if desired...

"A Crochet Mystery" series by Betty Hechtman

This series follows the life and amateur sleuthing of character Molly Pink. She works in a bookstore and participates in a crochet group and helps solve murder mysteries on the side. There are colorful characters which include a celebrity, an over the top flamboyant knitter, and male model turned businessman.

I tend to find that it is pretty easy for me to love 'cozy' mysteries so I really tried to give this series a good shot. After reading four of the books, I can't escape a few facts. I just couldn't enjoy the series because I could not find a way to empathize or identify with any of the characters with the possible exception of Dinah who is Molly Pink's best friend.

I have highlighted the books I read below in the list:

A Crochet Mystery Series

1. Hooked on Murder (2008)

2. Dead Men Don't Crochet (2008)

3. By Hook or By Crook (2009)

4. A Stitch in Crime (2009)

5. You Better Knot Die (2010)

6. Behind the Seams (2011)

7. If Hooks Could Kill (2012)

8. For Better or Worsted (2013)

9. Knot Guilty (2014)

10. Seams Like Murder (2016)

11. Hooking for Trouble (2016)

12. On The Hook (2018)

She also has written five books in a knitting series, but I haven't read any of them. I'm probably not going to as I really didn't find myself very enthralled with the series I did read a few books from. If you have read any of her books I would be interested on your take. I rarely dislike a book so I am a bit disappointed that I didn't like these. So please feel free to chime on in with your opinions of the novels if you have experienced them. I'm curious for other viewpoints.

I'm starting a series by Virginia Lowell. Maybe I will like that series better.

Poetry Found

Found poetry is a process where you take a page or a chapter of a book and cull phrases out of it to create a new piece of writing... a piece of poetry. I wrote this one from a chapter in a critical thinking textbook. Enjoy.


Ride the wave of knowledge

Learning is messy, sometimes painful

Interdisciplinarity is universal because it is everywhere

Pressures of reality, convention and popular bias …

Weigh too heavily on her mind

For the pure joy

Adhesion, integration, application, transformation…

Bigger than just words

A Hammer with which to shape it

A weapon the size of your fist

It is the journey that matters in the end

Sadness, Confusion, and Ice Cream for Breakfast

I have been feeling tired and worn down lately. Health problems and other issues have distracted me from many important things and blogging has fallen to the wayside during this time. I am going to try and do better with it, but I will admit I don't feel much enthusiasm about anything these days. I really wish that I didn't feel this way because I love to write. So I will endeavor to do better.

My grandfather passed away one year ago today. I feel a lot of conflicting emotions about it and it is still a tender spot. It feels so close in time to now that even my ex couldn't really comprehend this morning that it has been a full year- he was quite sure this event had happened more recently. So today has been filled with family, work, and dessert to help make the day more cheerful.

These pictures are a few days old, but I thought they would be fun to share today for a smile. Bug loves ice cream and his favorite currently is a cotton candy flavor- its blue and looks horrible but he is addicted. I was cooking breakfast the other day and he went and got a spoon out of the drawer and the ice cream from the freezer and sat down to eat it. When I noticed, I laughed and grabbed the phone to take a picture. Bug hates pictures so he immediately got up and tried to leave, but I still caught some of him in the picture.

The funny part is the spoon he was using. This picture gives a clearer view of the spoon he was using... which is supposed to be used to stir cocoa in mugs.

Happy Friday and love to all. :)

The Redwall Series- by Brian Jacques

Brian Jacques is a fairly prolific author and has written over twenty books in his 'Redwall' series. Bug and I have been reading them together and a world that is encompassed by animals and run by them is loads of fun. I can be challenging- this word contains the same problems or human world does and is filled with war, treachery, poverty, etc... On a positive notes, it contains all the positives that we also enjoy: love, family, friendship, bravery and more. This post will start by listing his titles in the Redwall series.

1. Redwall
2. Mossflower
3. Mattimeo
4. Mariel of Redwall
5. Salamandastron
6. Martin the Warrior
7. The Bellmaker
8. Outcast of Redwall
9. Pearls of Lutra
10. The Long Patrol
11. Marlfox
12. The Legend of Luke
13. Lord Brocktree
14. Taggerung
15. Triss

16. Loamhedge
17. Rakkety Tam
18. High Rhulain
19. Eulalia
20. Doomwyte
21. The Sable Queen
22. The Great Redwall Feast
23. A Redwall Winter’s tale
24. The Redwall Cookbook
25. Redwall: The Graphic Novel
26. The Legend of Redwall Abbey
27. Songs of Redwall

He also has a few other books that are members of smaller series or are stand alone novels. Here they are:

1. Castaways of the Flying Dutchman
2. The Angel’s Command
3. Voyage of Slaves

1. The Tale of Urso Brunov
2. Urso Brunov and the White Emperor

Seven Strange and Ghostly Tales
The Ribbajack

What are your thoughts?

pictures from: http://redwall.wikia.com/wiki/Brian_Jacques, https://books.google.com/books?id=x_7D6k-224EC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false, https://books.google.com/books/about/Redwall.html?id=vKGPDAAAQBAJ&source=kp_cover&hl=en, http://www.somagames.com/redwall-and-some-ground-rules/

The Hamish Macbeth Mystery Series (in order)

I am a pretty rabid fan of the two mystery series developed by M.C. Beaton aka Marion Chesney aka Marion Gibbons. This series features the unambitious and highly intuitive/observant character called Hamish Macbeth who lives in the small village of Lockduhb . If you haven't ever heard of this series before and you like mysteries, take some time to explore it as it is a fun explore! Here are the books in chronological order for the new reader. Also for fun, these characters have been turned into a TV series with three seasons so you can explore the characters in another format... the books are the best though!




Death of a Gossip (1985)
Death of a Cad (1987)
Death of an Outsider (1988)
Death of a Perfect Wife (1989)
Death of a Hussy (1990)
Death of a Snob (1992 )
Death of a Prankster (1992)
Death of a Glutton (1993) Also published under the title "Death of a Greedy Woman"
Death of a Travelling Man (1993)
Death of a Charming Man (1994)
Death of a Nag (1995)
Death of a Macho Man (1996)
Death of a Dentist (1997)
Death of a Scriptwriter (1998)
Death of an Addict (1999)
A Highland Christmas (1999)
Death of a Dustman (2001)
Death of a Celebrity (2002)
Death of a Village (2003)
Death of a Poison Pen (2004)
Death of a Bore (2005)
Death of a Dreamer (2006)
Death of a Maid (2007)
Death of a Gentle Lady (2008)
Death of a Witch (2009)
Death of a Valentine (2010)
Death of a Chimney Sweep (2011) Also published under the title "Death of a Sweep"
Death of a Kingfisher (2012)
Death of Yesterday (2013)
Death of a Policeman (2014)
Death of a Liar (2015)
Knock, Knock, You’re Dead (2016)
Death of a Nurse (2016)
Death of a Ghost (2017)

If you are exploring this series for the first time, please let me know how you liked it :)




pictures from: http://www.mcbeaton.com/us/author/, http://www.mcbeaton.com/us/books/hamish_macbeth_mysteries/death_of_a_ghost/

The Agatha Raisin Mystery Series (in order)

I am a pretty rabid fan of the two mystery series developed by M.C. Beaton aka Marion Chesney aka Marion Gibbons. This series features the detective and public relation skills of a character called Agatha Raisin who lives in a small village in Carsley. If you haven't ever heard of this series before and you like mysteries, take some time to explore it as it is a fun explore! Here are the books in chronological order for the new reader. Also for fun, these characters have finally been turned into a TV series so you can explore the characters in another format... the books are the best though!



Agatha Raisin and the Quiche of Death (1992)

Agatha Raisin and the Vicious Vet (1993)

Agatha Raisin and the Potted Gardener (1994)

Agatha Raisin and the Walkers of Dembley (1995)

Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage (1996)

Agatha Raisin and the Terrible Tourist (1997)

Agatha Raisin and the Wellspring of Death (1998)

Agatha Raisin and the Wizard of Evesham (1999)

Agatha Raisin and the Witch of Wyckhadden (1999)

Agatha Raisin and the Fairies of Fryfam (2000)

Agatha Raisin and the Love from Hell (2001)

Agatha Raisin and the Day the Floods Came (2002)

Agatha Raisin and the Case of the Curious Curate (2003)

Agatha Raisin and the Haunted House (2003)

Agatha Raisin and the Deadly Dance (2004)

Agatha Raisin and the Perfect Paragon (2005)

Love, Lies and Liquor: An Agatha Raisin mystery (2006)

Kissing Christmas Goodbye: An Agatha Raisin mystery (2007)

Agatha Raisin and a Spoonful of Poison (2008)

Agatha Raisin: There Goes the Bride (2009)

Agatha Raisin and the Busy Body (2010)

Agatha Raisin: As the Pig Turns (October 2011)

Agatha Raisin: Hiss and Hers (2012)

Agatha Raisin: Something Borrowed, Someone Dead (2013)

Agatha Raisin: The Blood of an Englishman (2014)

Agatha Raisin: Dishing the Dirt (2015)

Agatha Raisin: Pushing Up Daisies (2016)

If you are exploring this series for the first time, please let me know how you liked

pictures from: http://www.mcbeaton.com/us/author/, http://www.mcbeaton.com/us/books/agatha_raisin_mysteries/pushing_up_daisies/

Picture Book Analysis- "When Sheep Cannot Sleep: The Counting Book"

This is a book analysis I completed for a class this semester. This is one of Bug's favorite books so I was pleased to have an excuse to read it some more. I hope you enjoy. :)

In their quest to create and motivate young readers, both authors and publishing houses try to create a work of literature that can stand on its own and that, due to design, storyline and subject matter, can turn more people into readers. Different authors and publishing groups may value different topics and book designs based on past sales or perceived enthusiasm for a topic. This paper attempts to analyze the book “When Sheep Cannot Sleep- The Counting Book” and discuss its distinct place in enjoyable literature for young children.

This beginning reader / picture book was written and illustrated by Satoshi Kitamura who lives in London, England as a Japanese expatriate. He is a prolific author who has won some awards for his varied works. “When Sheep Cannot Sleep” was nominated for a Mockingbird award and was awarded the New York Times Notable Book of the Year award in 1988. The distinctive designs that set the author apart from other illustrators and bold watercolor designs complement the simple storyline of a sheep named Woolly who finds himself unable to fall asleep and goes on an adventure instead. During his adventure he meets other animals and discovers lightning, an empty house, and things to do, draw, chase and eat. Finally he ends up in bed and falling asleep to his quiet thoughts and his images of counting the members of his family in his head.

The straightforwardly moving storyline keeps the book interesting for children ages three to eight years old. However, the author’s secondary purpose is to promote counting for the older preschool reader. They can not only follow the adventures of Woolly, but each page is also set up as a counting game. The reader can enjoy the story of Woolly trying to pick apples, having a conversation with squirrels about the apples, and then using a ladder to reach the apples, while also being able to count upward as the story progresses. His adventure moves from more squirrels than apples, more rungs on the ladder than squirrels and eventually to an empty house with a cozy bed just for him. At the end of the book, the author has made an index that tells the reader what images were meant to be counted in both visuals and words in a clear, easy to read format. By adding a second purpose to the book, the author has created a work that can be used for more than one age group. With bold colors but instructive illustrations that move the story line along, but also ask readers to pause and genuinely look at the pictures, this book invents more opportunities for the reader to interact with the story as they grow. The tension created between the detailed illustrations that ask readers to slow down and ‘look’ and the dialogue which suggests to the reader to speed up was perfect- by the time the reader is developmentally able to notice the tension between words and illustration, he or she is starting to interact by counting and the tension eases.

This book also capitalizes on a few characteristics common to many children’s books. Animals are something that children are highly motivated to learn about, so by creating a main character who is a sheep and several secondary characters that are also animals (squirrels, owls, bats, etc..) there is a strong impetus for the reader to continue on with the story. The illustrations are very colorful which draw the eye towards them and helps to create a sense of peace and lack of urgency in the reader, yet also enthusiasm to continue with the adventure. As a reader, we enjoy following in the path of this poor insomniac sheep because his adventures and environment are simply too interesting- in some ways we as readers no longer have any interest in sleeping either until, with luck, the story promotes in the reader the urge to tuck into bed like Woolly and start to count sheep themselves behind the dark of their own eye lids. The story flows from adventure to peaceful quiet and an urge to join our animal friends in blessed slumber. It also asks the reader to question some of the subtle details in the illustrations: Why are so many animals awake past their bedtime? Why are there so many doors in the house and why are all the doors in the home closed except for one? Why does Woolly feel comfortable entering what appears to be an empty, unknown house that he finds on his adventure and happily cooks some peas and tucks himself into bed? Why are we as readers comfortable with Woolly’s behavior in regards to the house and are not frightened? These questions are only able to be answered by the imagination of the reader.

There are a few themes that are covered in this particular text. The first and most obvious is the pattern of a child having a busy day and then following through the nightly bedtime rituals that put the child in bed and asleep. In some ways, this story reminds us of our lives; we get up, have an adventure, and finish the day in bed ready to begin again on the morrow. Another theme is the pattern of growth- as the story continues, more and more characters or things to count are added to the text, creating depth where there was simplicity. Counting and animals are also themes used in the text. The last theme that comes to mind that is expressed in this book is to simply enjoy the good aspects of life. Giving young children the ability to follow an animal in its evening rituals, to learn more about the world surrounding them, and to create early motivation toward understanding numbers and their uses in our lives is not something to be taken for granted. I highly recommend this particular picture book for any parent with young children for an enjoyable and comfortable read that also encourages fun and learning.



pictures from: http://us.macmillan.com/whensheepcannotsleep/satoshikitamura/9780374483593/, https://cuentoenlasnoches.blogspot.com/2015/03/fernando-furioso-hiawyn-oran-y-satoshi.html, http://us.macmillan.com/whensheepcannotsleep/satoshikitamura/9780374483593/, http://bokmal.com.ua/books/when-sheep-cannot-sleep-kitamura/

Starting Again...

It's been awhile since I've been on here. I've been doing a bit of writing on the side, but I will admit that I feel slightly uncomfortable with the idea of putting a lot of personal information on this blog since it has been found by family... so I simply delay and then never put anything up. I want to try and reclaim the blog for myself, but I will admit that I am unclear as to how to do that. So I'll probably be a bit sporadic over the next few months. Starting again was the hardest part... so here I am giving it a try.

To any loyal readers, thank you for being patient. Comments are still more than welcome and will just be slow to post due to moderation. Any specific topics that you wish me to cover can still be requested through comments as well. Thank you for continuing the journey with me. :)

History of a Song: April - “He is Risen”

The beautiful words for this hymn were written by Cecil F. Alexander (1818-1895) and the music was written by Joachim Neander (1650-1680). The story of how these two pieces of art were combined to make the beautiful song we enjoy must be unique as the German musical composer and the Irish poet lived more than a century apart. Unable to uncover the details of the merging, I am sharing the biographies of the artists themselves :)

Cecil Francis Humphreys Alexander was born in Dublin in April 1818 to Major John Humphreys and his wife Elizabeth. Cecil Francis, who preferred to be called 'Franny, loved writing from her youngest years. At first, she hid her writing from everyone, but after a notebook of her writing was discovered by her father when she was nine, she shared her poetry every Sunday with her family with the encouragement of her father who would read it out loud to the group and it could be commented on. Franny was deeply religious and in October 1850, she married William Alexander in Strabane where he was an Anglican clergyman. During their marriage, both partners continued to write poetry and Franny also became involved in charity work, giving money to an institution to the 'Deaf and Dumb” that was founded in 1846. During her lifetime, she wrote almost 400 poems with many set to music and four which have made their way into the modern day LDS Church hymnals and Children's Songbook. Her music has also been published in the Church of Ireland hymnals and her book titled “Hymns for Little Children” has had over 69 editions printed of it. She passed away on October 12, 1895.

Joachim Neander was born in 1650 in Bremen to his father Johann Joachim Neader and his wife Catharina Knipping. He was the oldest of several children who ended up being a private tutor at his majority because he could not afford to continue to attend Bremen University after his father's death. In his twenties, he discovered theology and, while he continued for some time to tutor students as the rector of the Latin school of Dusseldorf, he began to write nature studies and hymns. He wrote over 60 hymns and is considered one of the outstanding hymn writers of the German Reformed church with his work published in many Lutheran hymnbooks and embraced by Methodists and Baptists as well in their hymnals. Most of his works have been translated into English and towards the end of his life he became a pastor for St Martin's church in Bremen. He died there of tuberculosis (possibly with complications of plague) on May 31, 1680. He also has the unique distinction of being the only hymn writer to have a valley and cave in Germany named after him as well as the fossil hominid that was found there. (Neanderthal man)


This song is still sung and performed by choirs and church congregations around the world. It has been performed by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir as well as some mainstream Christian music groups. This is my favorite Easter hymn and the holiday isn't the same without it. Do you sing this hymn in your congregation? What are your thoughts?


photos from : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Frances_Alexander, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joachim_Neander

It's Time...

I have had a nice sabbatical over the last several months and I am ready to begin again. Writing is such a part of my head and my heart that I am thrilled at the idea f starting again. I have some outlines on topics for this year - history fans, etc... will have quite a few things that they will enjoy. As I head to sleep on this beautiful evening on the first evening of this year, may we all sleep well and tell someone that we love them and how much they mean to us today. Let start a great new year together! And if you have any specific requests for the year, please share in the comments. :)

Thoughts on Kevin Kelly and Predictions on Technology

*For this discussion, we started by watching a youtube video that war filmed in 2007 that you can find here. I highly recommend it! It is a video by Kevin Kelly about predictions on technology and computers.

This was a really interesting video and I am really impressed with Kevin Kelly and his research. He certainly made a quite a few predictions that are true today and I am interested to see how his predictions for the future turn out… it appears he will be pretty on there as well. One thing that I thought was interesting and I have spent some time chewing on is that the more transparent we are on personal things, the more we can gain. I am still a bit of a dinosaur when it comes to technology- mostly because I just can’t afford it- and I do share some things that are personal on Facebook and through email but I am still really learning about all of this. And even when saying that, I really that I am codependent on my technology that I do use. So is my place of work, my school, and most places that I go to. I was thinking about it and I see benefits to being so dependent on machines and also some downsides. I think that everything in life has some benefits and not so good things… anyone who has kids knows that ;) I like being able to get personalized recommendations and to be able to research and do things that so much more easily, but I also do not like being inundated with ads and other useless things. Thinking of the web as a living breathing beast was a metaphor that really did seem to work for me and thinking about how we are teaching machines to see and think for us and eventually being able to do it much better than us collectively (I think we are there now actually) is an image I do not think I will lose soon.

One last thing that I thought about was how ‘we cannot imagine ourselves without writing or alphabets’. That is really true. I love reading and do it as much as I can. I love writing and consider it one of my best talents. I can’t imagine a life without that and it is a pleasure to hold a book in my hand and sometimes I wake up with that same book there. But I also wake up with a phone next to be to so that I can check my email, etc… So I am changing slowly but adding technology when I can. I feel sad that so many books are not being read on a computer but it also makes books more available for people to read and that’s a great thing. How can I be upset about that? So it is interesting to think about how we are embodying machines with our characteristics and anchoring our lives around them as well.

Thoughts on Gcflearnfree....

At the site gcflearnfree.org, I checked out a few tutorials on some things that interested me. This was another site that I hadn't heard of before and after some time on it, I had a little bit of a mixed opinion. Since I struggle hard core with math in my personal life, I thought I would start there. The math portion was divided into sections that covered the basics and a little bit of fourth grade math (fractions), but except for some basics it didn't really do much for me. For instance, it gives practice problems, but doesn’t give a way to check your answers to see if you understood- if they do I couldn't find it. There was a zombie game in that section which I tried and that would allow you to do the math problem and let you know whether you arrived at the right answer or not and it was a little fun, but I thought it might also be stressful because you have to 'rush' the answers or the zombie will 'get you'. That said I realized that I was better at addition in my head than I thought ;)

I glanced through “All the Topics” next and I found that there were a lot of good topics, but not many that interested me right now. I looked at reading because it is one of my favorite things to do and I thought the exercises were great- only thing I would have changed is except for the 'grammar' section, there wasn't much on writing. (I suspect that is because writing is much too complex to put in small bites – at least that's how I see writing.) I also looked at the Microsoft office section because I am currently taking a beginner's computer class and that is something that we are learning about. I found that the topics I already understood well I could understand clearly in the exercises, but I did struggle a little with trying to figure them out if I didn't already have some understanding of the concept discussed.

I think that this might be a site that I would use again, but I didn't feel completed grabbed by the site in such a way that I will be more likely to use it on a regular basis. It was good to learn about and I am interested to see what other people thought of it. I think if I was in a position to be able to use the internet more and to need the information it provided I would be more interested in using it more often. Anyway, it's good to know! :)

What do you think? Have you tried it? On a semi weird note, when I first saw the website title I read it so fast that I thought it was about gluten free stuff and I was really excited... and then confused for the first few seconds of looking at the site... You can't tell what's always in my head, can ya? :D

Genocide in Our Time – Introduction to February’s Topic

Over the last few years, I have found out so much information on the act of genocide and man’s inhumanity to man that I feel pretty well verses in it. This month I am going to focus on some modern day genocides as well as my thoughts on them, actions and ideals that are more likely to lead to violence, ethnic cleansing and genocide as well as a few books and related topics. There are many more genocides that I studied but I will not include writings about because they are pretty graphic and I am not sure a PG -13 blog is the best place for all of it. I do think it’s important to start the conversation and not hide the reality of humanity and what we are capable of… we have genocides happening in our world right now…. This is not an act we have become to civilized to perform.

So this is your introduction to the topics and ideas that will be discussed throughout February. Welcome! : )

1. picture from http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2014/04/02/11-powerful-photos-from-the-aftermath-of-the-rwandan-genocide/

2015 Poetry Corner # 1 - ' A Winter Morning'

Softness, comfort, surrounded by warmth
cocooned in the dark and the quilts
content purring fills the air
soft fur splayed across my cheek

Outside is cold; oh, bitterly so!
But inside, all is cozy and adoring
the blessings of a winter night at home
a warm bed, a peaceful heart... :)

Hiatus...

Well, the last few months have been a bit crazy with all my classes and everything going on right now. So the blog has pretty much been pushed aside while I dealt with everything and got my school work done. However, in answer to the email I received today, the blog is still active and actually the next few months will be very busy with reading for my consuming family and public as I begin to edit and post my assignments and writings from my classes. I have writings on human behavior, racism, genocide, history, eugenics, gender studies and more... so for those of you who have been waiting… don’t stress! More is coming…. ;)

I love you all and look forward to trying to share and continuing introspection in the new year. Anything you want me to research, share, etc… feel free to ask. I might be willing to do so. :)

2014 Poetry Corner # 11 : "Eye" (a haiku)

Bright light pours in
The pupil contracts, we blink
the world is clear

A Memory of Service

Have you ever had one of those really busy days that has kept you so busy and focused on a to-do list that the entire day is a blur except for a brief time of sacrifice and connection that was unplanned, spontaneous and wondrous. I had one a little bit ago... and while I can't remember that much of the many boring errands I did... I remember this part of the day. I went to the library to try and pick up a few books on the new subject that I am going to try and learn. I dropped off some stuff and went to the reference desk and started a discussion with the librarian on what I was looking for. A few minutes into our discussion, a young man walked over and stood behind me. Looking nervous and sad, he waited and since I had asked for some research that would take a few minutes to get, the librarian asked him what he needed. Quietly, he asked how often a comma needed to be used when using the word 'but' in a letter. In a typical librarian fashion - I'm sure that many of you know what I mean- she responded to his question by saying it matters when in the sentence the word was, the topic of the sentence and even the grammar being used by the writer. His face showed so much confusion and he looked down at his paper and asked if she could read it and tell him whether he needed commas. It was so sad and hard to watch and when the librarian said that she would try to help him after she had finished with me, I asked him if I could try to edit his letter for him. He was silent for a moment and I said quickly, “It's not my business what's in it and I won't say anything to anyone. I have very good grades in English and I'm just waiting here while she looks up my information so I'm happy to try and help." He smiled and handed over his letter.

To be blunt, it was awful. I think I am a decent writer, not great. My spelling skills are awful and I'm sure a few people have noticed that I actually do not like to proofread so I don't do it very often. But with my limited experience, I could see spelling and grammatical errors as well as run on sentences and wording that didn't make a great deal of sense. So I sat down with him and we went over every single line. Over half an hour together, we changed his letter asking for financial aid to the college into something I felt really good about. His hope to go to school so that he can help those with abuse or substance abuse problems was reworded so that it didn't state he wanted to help cause substance or abuse problems and other small little tweaks. He told me about his new child and his desire to be self sufficient and we parted as friends. We may never see each other again, but in that period of time we were both able to enjoy each others company and be grateful for the talents that each of us were willing to share. I arrived home feeling a bit more cheery and feeling that I had actually accomplished something good... and not just necessary errands. I hope I can enjoy that wonderful feeling of peace and opportunity again soon!

What Do You Think?

So I had a really quick question. I am making a list of ideas for future blog posts... fun things to research, etc..... I've actually thought of few off the top of my head over the last few days that interest me, but I thought I would hang the question out there for others to offer suggestions. Anything that you are interested in that any of you might like me to research just for you? A short, but sweet post.... please share your thoughts. :)

Blast From the Past.... 3/21/96 : 'The Bell Jar'

So, I was going through some old scrapbooks that I have and I found a few neat treasures. When I was younger I used to write a lot and English was one of my better subjects. Today I found a few old school reports that I wrote years ago. So I think I might share a few of them. :)

This paper is a book report of the publication “The Bell Jar” which was originally published by Harper and Row in 1971. It is the most well known book authored by Sylvia Plath, but originally published under the name of the pseudonym Victoria Lucas. I wrote this report and turned it in on March 21, 1996 for a Psychology class in my first few semesters of college. Part one is the book report summary that I wrote, part two is my analysis and thoughts on why the book is important to the field of psychology, and part three is my full analysis and conclusions I formed on the book. I haven't changed any of the wording – I entered it exactly as written – so its interesting to see how my writing has changed over time. This report earned me 100% / A . At the time, I was so proud and pleased and while I am not sure I deserved the grade after reading it again now, I hope you enjoy it. :)

Part I - Summary

Ester Greenwood, now 19, grew up in a small town with her brother and her mother. She is now in college, which she is able to afford because of a scholarship. As a hobby, she writes essays and small stories and sends them in to win contests, which she does win quite often. After winning one contest, she was sent to New York for one month, all expenses paid, to work as a junior editor of a fashion magazine. While there, she stayed in an all-women hotel called The Amazon. Her friend, Doreen, comes from a society girls school and carried an air of sophistication. She took Ester out to go to a party and on the way they stop and allow themselves to be picked up by some guys. One of them, Lenny Shepard, took Doreen and Ester to his house and when he Doreen became notably drunk and began to make out, Ester walked home. Later, when Doreen shows up drunk at her door, Ester resolves to become better friends with another girl (Betsy) who shares more of her values. Ester does have what could be loosely termed as a 'boyfriend'. Buddy Wilkins is currently studying to be a doctor, but doesn't see her much because he caught TB and is no residing in a recovery camp. Ester doesn't think of him as her boyfriend; she simply uses him as an excuse to others and to discourage the blind dates that were often heaped upon her.

Ester goes to one of the free luncheons with Betsy and shows her love for food, especially caviar. She eats until she is stuffed and, as bad luck would have it, when it is discovered that some food at the luncheon was poisoned, Ester was the sickest girl among them. In fact, all of the twelve participants in this contest were sick, except for Doreen who had skipped the luncheon to spend time with Lenny. It is at this time that her temporary boss questions her about her plans for the future and she realizes that she doesn't know what she wants to do after college. Right now, she is having a hard time with physics and is worried sick about chemistry next semester. Through a little trickery and persuasion, however, she manages to talk the dean of the college into allowing her to take chemistry, but because she had received an 'A' the semester before in physics (and she would easily get one again in chemistry), she would not have to test for her grade. She would simply be given an 'A' at the end of the semester. It was during this semester that Buddy's mother set her up with a visitor for another country so she would show him the city. She, still being a virgin and taking a liking to the fellow, decided to seduce him. Being a gentleman, he declined her advances.

At Christmas, Mrs. Wilkins picks her up and takes her to see Buddy at TB camp. There, he asks her to marry him, but refuses him saying that she doesn't want to marry anyone. She does stay for an extra day to spend time with him and allows him to attempt to teach her to ski. She has an accident, unfortunately, and breaks her leg. She then returns to New York and packs to go home, allowing Doreen to take her out for one last party. There she meets Marco, her first 'woman hater.' He is bitter because he is in love with his first cousin who is going to become a nun. He later tries to force himself on her and when she struggles and begins to cry, leaves very disgusted with her. She then goes and gets on a train for home.

After returning home, her mother informs her that she was not accepted into the writing class that she has depended on. She becomes depressed and when Buddy pushes her to come see him again, she terminates the relationship. She then goes through a period of indecisiveness where she starts and quits a novel, her thesis and other ideas. When she goes to see the family doctor about a stronger dose of sleeping medication, she is referred to Dr. Gordon, a psychiatrist.

After displaying no thought about personal hygiene or safety, Dr. Gordon starts her on Daily therapy sessions. Later, he tries shock therapy. After one dose, she tells her mother that she will not go again, which makes her mother very happy. During this time, an old friend sets her up with a young man named Cal with whom she discreetly brings up the subject of suicide and discusses with him the best ways to carry it out. After experimenting a few times and realizing that her body's defense mechanisms would always try and stop her, she stole her sleeping pills from her mothers lockbox and hid herself in the basement. She then took as many as she could before passing out. She is later found alive and taken to the hospital.

P. Ginea, a famous novelist, discovers what happened to her young fan and has her moved to a private psychiatric hospital. Here, she is given medication and ends up gaining a lot of weight. She also gets a new doctor named Dr. Nolan. In this place, she finds Joan, an old acquaintance that she had met in school and finds some common ground and insight into herself. She received a few more sessions of shock therapy and is then moved to Belside, the house for those who were almost 'cured' and would b sent back out into the outside world. Here, she is allowed to go to town where she meets Irwin. They date a few times and she decides to seduce him, which she later does. A complication from this painful act sends her to the emergency room. Later on, she is given the news that Joan has killed herself. A few weeks later she is taken to her interview that will release that will release her again to the outside world.

Part II – Importance to the Field of Psychology

I chose this book for many reasons. Most of the books on the provided list I had already read in my high school classes. I wanted a book that I hadn't read before, but also a book that might give me some insight into myself. I had no idea what topics this book discussed when I picked it up. I figured that if I didn't like it or it was too boring I could always get a different book.

Even though I really didn't enjoy the book, this book did appeal to me because of the wide range of topics it touched on. From motivation, behavior, social skills, to its main theme of depression, this book made me stop and wonder how I would deal with the same situations. The thing I liked best about the book was that it was written as if we were sitting in Ester's head and just listening to her thoughts and looking through her eyes. This made it almost impossible to tell when she first became depressed and how her disease progressed until you realize that she is extremely depressed and is thinking of killing herself.

The chapter that I thought best represents the whole book was chapter thirteen: Psychopathology. This chapter discusses many different kinds of mental illness or disorders and includes depression in this category. On page 512 of the required text, the entire page is dedicated to showing research that has been done on depression and what causes suicide. The book states that “while most depressed people do not commit suicide, most suicides are attempted by depressed people.” This suggests that if depression is found early enough in individuals and alleviated, we will have found a solution to our problem of the rise of suicide. Depression is most commonly brought about by failures, trauma or stress. The chapter also discusses signs and symptoms so you can recognize what depression is and what o do if you or anyone you know needs help. Reading this book also helped give me a perspective I have never had (and hopefully never will) and I hope it will make me more understanding to others in my environment when they just need a little boost.

Part III - Analysis and Conclusions

In all fairness, I would not have chosen this book as one of the books I have read for fun. Most books I chose to read allow me to escape from my life and find some comfort in a 'fantasy world' for a short period of time. I can't honestly say I enjoyed this book, but I can say that this book gave me some insight into a topic that I really hadn't thought of. I was able to follow Ester into her 'world' and feel with her, but I was detached enough so that I can see where rational thought ended and she gave herself up to depression.

The subject of depression will be pondered and studied for many years to come. Even in our advanced society, depression is hard to diagnose and very high percentages are never treated. Even though Ester was a fictional character, she was easy to identify with. To me, she represented the average person; just an individual trying to stay afloat in all the stress and worry of everyday life. I feel that this is a very important subject for many reasons. As technology becomes more advanced and human beings are competing for jobs with computers, problems with self esteem and uniqueness will occur. People will not feel able to compete with a machine that will never be sick, always be smarter, never too tired to work, and whose only weakness is that it must be attached an energy source. Problems at home will never cause it to low down and it will take little notice of small aggravations that you will find in the average workplace (mis-communication, personality conflicts, etc...) I believe that this will cause a rise in depression and other mental disorders.

In conclusion, I have to wonder about the author. After reading a little on her life from an autobiography, I admire her for trying to create a work like this. Any attempt to share feelings to try and enrich other generations is a noble cause. But one thought came to my mind and is nagging me for an answer which I can supply; was this book a cry for help from the author? Did she feel trapped and felt no hope? The autobiography says that she ended her own life. I just wonder why no one close to her, when reading her book, didn't notice similarities or suspect anything. Maybe she too, like so many others would still be alive today if someone had heard her cry for help.