Notes from "Walking the Bible"

I recently finished a DVD/ book set titled "Walking the Bible: A Journey by Land Through the Five Books of Moses." Taking a spiritual journey along side someone else's journey can be challenging yet it can have advantages as well. Many of us have our journeys alongside spouses and friends, children and acquaintances. Lately, my journey has been walked alone with books or acquaintance conversations and this set was really interesting because the addition of the DVD and its images helped create a more thought provoking environment for learning. The paragraphs below are notes from the book and video series. These passages really stuck with me and I have enjoyed chewing on the words more than once in the last month. Even though this was Bruce Feiler's journey, his words have changed my journey a bit as any good thoughtful religious text can. I'm happy to share the quoted paragraphs below. Please feel free to share your thoughts as well.



"Does it really matter?" "What do you mean does it matter- Oh course it matters! That’s not why we came here. We came to see the traditional place." Maybe Arbur was right- finding the ark may not be so important. What’s important was that people who told the story of Noah understood the landscape they were talking about. And the story was still alive in this place. The people who live here are still connected to it.

But now that I am here I am beginning to realize that science can’t answer all of those questions. Even if I did find a piece of Noah’s ark and even if I could prove it was 5000 years old and even if I found a piece of wood that said ‘Noah built me,’ I’m still not going to prove that God ordered Noah to build it. OK, so I get that, but still its hard to let go of that comfort of science. If I give up that, what am I looking for?

For my whole life I felt connected to the place where I was born. I was this traveler I would go out and then I would bounce back home. I was like a bungee cord. Now for the first time I felt that cord catch in another place. It’s as if I found a home I didn’t even know what I was looking for. And when I went back to the Bible I realized that the Hebrew word for Adam is ha-adam or earth. “From dust you are,” God says to Adam, “to dust you shall return.” The Bible seems to be saying with these very words that we come from these places ,were made from these places, and we carry these places along with us.

For the first time since we started, I felt a sense of contentment and peace. It wasn’t just what I was learning about the history of the Bible. The landscape itself was beginning to give me answers… answers to some internal longing I hadn’t even identified. Some journeys we choose I realize. Some journeys choose us.


What would I do in this situation? Would you do it? Would you kill for God? I don’t know. For me Abraham is unique … very special. It was an beginning for me to try and find an answer of that specific question which forced me to examine my own relationship with God. When I first started this journey on the roots of the bible, the stories and images seemed so vague in my mind. They no longer seem distant to me. They are no longer distant; by visiting these places I feel like I have entered the bible itself.

Stories are universal and have the remarkable ability thousands of years after they were first written down to become personal for each of us. My geographic adventure was turning into a very different kind of journey.

A Nativity Metaphor

One of the things that I love about Christmas time is the varied opportunities to set up nativity scenes with my Bug. He has loved them since he was less than a year old and with fascination would reach towards the animals until one was handed to him. At this point in my life I have three incomplete sets of nativity pieces that with much laughter and smiles are carefully set up next to each other. Every year, the different pieces end up moving around the room as Joseph may be dragged off by a cat or Bug's service dog may casually pick one up when we are not looking and chew it to bits... or they even move when we use the pieces to recreate stories. These stories can be the birth of Christ as told in the Gospel of Luke or can become as varied as the barn scene in "The Last Battle" by C.S. Lewis. Sometimes, we just play farm and feed and tend to the animals that come with these nativity sets- always cows and sheep, but sometimes donkeys, horses, and even camels. Over the years I have worked pretty hard to make sure that my son understands that the nativity story with the animals is a tradition and is fun, but is very much not what the scriptures describe the events of the birth of Christ to be. The nativity tradition, while beautiful and fun, is not scriptural and in some ways seems to take away from the importance and the struggle of the event itself that we Christians celebrate - the birth of our Savior.

This year after Thanksgiving, I happily brought out the nativity sets for setting up. As usual, Bug and I sat down and placed them in the places we wanted. We added real hay and shavings to one of the stables and it always feels wonderful to sit back and look at the different groups. The sets are quite easy to tell apart as one is a Fisher Price plastic set, a hand carved wood set and a paper mache set that was hand painted for me by the young women of my branch a few years ago. I noticed this year that as the pieces began to be moved and scattered around the house, my son clearly had a very different image in his mind as he put them back and by the time that Christmas Day arrived, I had a very different nativity scene to view. So at a terribly early hour of the morning, while everyone else opened presents, I found my eyes and my thoughts drawn back towards the nativity scene in front of me. What I saw was three small smiling babies in the center of a large group which was then surrounded by animals and then the people. In some ways it looked a bit like how I feel about the sun.... the edges are easily seen but looking at the center is too bright, too hard.... too much. After the required present opening and fun, I chatted with Bug about the nativity and some of the same things that I saw as I looked down were emotions and ideas that he had been trying in a small way to suggest. Here are our thoughts:

1. How people picture the Savior can vary greatly on their perspective. His race, skin color, culture, facial expressions, etc... are things that are developed created by each of us and our religious culture. While every single person may see the Savior, his life, and his commandments differently, for those who celebrate his birth and life, we tend to see him as the center of our heart- the nucleus of our living soul. This is where Jesus Christ should be - in our minds and hearts, our thoughts and hopes. In essence, he should be our center and our life should revolve around him and our relationship with him.

2. The animals were set around him as a protection. Animals are pure and live the lives that they have been set to lead on this earth. They are here to live, to teach us, to sometimes feed us and to help us to recognize the divine all around us. As such, most animals will likely recognize the Christ in the flesh before we human beings shall and as each creature recognizes its spiritual heart, they will surround him in joy and protect him from harm.

3. People are on the outside of the circle as we are frail, easily distracted and of skewed perspectives. When we look at pictures of Christ with his mother and images that celebrate his birth, for many the joy is in the rest of the image behind the holy child... the cow in the next stall, the sheep standing next to a shepherd, the donkey tied up nearby. When we perform the nativity story in plays, each of the actors in the nativity are likely to play their character to the hilt and in most traditional nativities, they are more animals than people. So the majority of the action comes from the animals as well as the majority of the space taken up. As I discovered to my cost last year, telling a friend that having animals in a Nativity scene isn't scriptural can seriously get you gossiped and talked about even when the comment was mentioned in a closed door, private meeting. I was really surprised at how offended someone could get over the idea that Christ wasn't surrounded from his first earthly breath with joyous, happy livestock crowding in toward the manger for a better look. As Bug told me, "We see what we want to see, animals see what is there."

I look back a week later on this experience and find myself pretty pleased and tearful. I am grateful for an amazing and thoughtful child who is kind and empathetic and good-hearted. I am grateful that even with some of his learning challenges, Bug is aware of how to live a good life and is able to understand many human frailties and stumbling blocks. He also seems to understand where the Savior should be in our lives... in our hearts, the focus.... the center of our being. This is a Christmas gift I will never forget and always be grateful for. Tomorrow, my son will be 14 years old. I look forward to celebrating his birthday with him and eating cake. I am thankful for the gifts he has given me... especially these thoughts. Love you Bug. :)

Genocide Denial - the Midianites and the Holodomor

I am still trying to decide for myself what the term' genocide' means with all its nuances and difficulties, but I feel pretty secure in saying that I do not believe that there is a lot of middle ground in the definition. If you have a desire/intent to rid yourself of a group of people specifically for something that they 'are' or what they have, it's genocide in my definition- no matter how successful you were at doing so. I take issue with the term 'somehow less genocidal' because genocide = genocide period. Causing the death of people for their politics is just as much a genocide as doing so for the excuses of race or religion. As we have studied this semester, I have found myself going back to things I have read or heard about that dilute the intensity of the word genocide by excusing or diverting the conversation away from the facts. An example is the attempted extermination of the Midianites by the Israelites in antiquity. The Israelite and their prophet Moses were frustrated by growing religious tensions between the two groups of people and that some Israelites were converting or following teachings that came from the Midianites religion. The God of the Israelites told Moses to kill all of the Midianites and the Israelite armies were sent out and conquered their foes returning home with all of enemy's property/ livestock as well as the women and children who survived the battle. Accordingly, when the soldiers returned to Moses with all the bounty, he is angry and tells them to kill everyone but the virgin girls. That was done and the passage ends with ritual purifying.

Some apologists suggest that God – and therefore Moses- only allowed the virgin girls to live because they would have had nothing to do with idol worship and that was why everyone else had to die. Others state that killing and war were necessary evils at the time and this was normal behavior. At least one source suggests that as Midianites are mentioned later in the Bible, this couldn't be a genocide because not all of the Midianites were killed- They were able to fight another war with the Israelites later. However, boy children and infants would also have had nothing to do with idol worship and they were killed and if some people managed to escape death that doesn’t make a genocide 'not a genocide'.... it simply changes the evaluation of its success.

Today the Russian government still denies the existence of the Holodomor in Ukraine in 1932-33. (For a brief description and information see here.) I think the fact that the Russian government and diplomats took the time and opportunity to help shape the language of the “Convention on the Prevention and Punishment of the Crime of Genocide' to exclude a 'targeted group' in their country makes one thing really clear to me... the men who helped craft the definition knew that what they did was genocide and so worked to make sure it wouldn't 'qualify'. I frankly find that heinous. I find the denial and the active participation to bury the crime almost as heinous as the original transgression. I believe this partly because I think that people who deny it because they genuinely do not believe the 'crime' happened and believe it has been made up are people that are so ignorant I can feel sorry for their lack of knowledge and understanding. Having a full knowledge and working to deny something for financial motives or to give yourself more credibility in front of other governments and the international community is pretty challenging for me to understand. I also find it provocative that a signatory of this convention who has basically agreed to try to 'prevent and punish actions of genocide in war and peacetime' ... is actively trying to distract the world from their own culpability and failings in the same areas. So to look at the Holodomor as 'somewhat less genocidal' seems a bit distracting and disingenuous; i.e. it's either a genocide or not. The major reason that seems to be given – that Stalin’s plans killed millions... many of whom were not Ukrainian, seems disingenuous at best because what that statement tells me is that those who say it recognize that it is a genocide.... just a much bigger one that encompassed a large 'class' of people rather than just Ukrainians.. (Lastly, I find a small irony in the fact that Russia has politically accepted the existence of the Armenian Genocide in Turkey and denies this one... they seem to be so alike in my mind that every argument to prove the “Great Catastrophe' proves the Holodomor as well.... deportations, false political accusations, government seizure of property, denial of food shipments and journalists, etc...)

That begs the question then as to whether the Holodomor is a genocide or not? The legal definition of genocide includes acts committed with the intent to destroy, in whole or in part, a national ethnical, racial or religious group. Acts include killing or causing serious physical/ mental harm and imposing measures intended to damage the group, prevent re-population and/or forcibly removing youth from the group to integrate them into other populations. When the whole of the Holodomor is looked at in this perspective and broken down, we can see how clearly this 'series of decisions/acts fits into the legal definition. Joseph Stalin created the artificial famine by decreeing impossible quotas on grain/ other food products and tight enforcement of them. When it was obvious that his plan was causing starvation and mass death, he did not change anything about the policy and actively denied food aid offered from other countries. If he didn't know what the consequences were when he started his plan, he certainly had the information to figure it out and stop it as time went by. However, written evidence suggests he knew full well what the consequences would be for the peasants by ordering 'the destruction of the kulaks as a class'. When he was told about what was happening from some of his own men, Stalin was quoted as saying, “Wouldn't it be better for you to leave your post and become a writer so you can concoct more fables!” He created orders to shoot anyone who stole even a small amount of food and reflected that it would be much easier to just deport all the Ukrainians but that wasn't possible. Along with other evidence, it seems clear that the intent to kill and demoralize the Ukrainian population has been proved. The Holodomor included millions of deaths as well as serious mental and physical harm as has been testified to by the survivors in their stories of cannibalism, deaths and oppression. Starvation as well as the inability to disperse themselves to safer areas also curtailed births as family relationships and communities collapsed. The Holodomor fits the definition of genocide without any difficulty. It is regrettable that its existence is still being denied and a source of contention between Russia and the Ukraine. The challenges that both countries are going through now seem to stem from the same problems and ideas that caused this genocide in the first place. Moving forward from a place of contention doesn't seem like a great way to move forward... more like a way to potentially have another serious conflict arise again that has the potential to turn into a genocide. I hope that will change… another genocide would be more than tragic, it would be… I just don’t have the words…

pictures from: http://freethoughtnation.com/moses-and-the-midianites/, http://www.patheos.com/blogs/tinseltalk/2012/01/was-moses-black-urban-daily-proposes-black-actors-for-spielberg-biblical-epic/, http://rt.com/news/holodomor-famine-pirozhenko-ukraine/, http://ocfordarfur.wordpress.com/2008/09/

Stories from the Bible: Tamar

One of my favorite people to think about in the Old Testament is Tamar. Many people haven't actually heard of her and I suspect that's for a few reasons. With very few exceptions we do not hear much about women in the scriptures anyway and those exceptions tend to be women who are being held up as bad examples. A wonderful LDS feminist named Laurel Thatcher Ulrich wrote a book whose title has become quite a popular catch phrase that pretty succinctly makes that point: “Well -Behaved Women Seldom Make History.” Another reason is that in many ways, Tamar's story is very peripheral to even the group of stories that she is in. One of the things that I find interesting is that her story was even included at all... and I think of the thousands of women whose stories weren't included at all. I wonder what makes her story so special in the fact that it was considered important enough to include it or if her story was only included because of the men in it.

Tamar's story is short and actually begins when she is old enough to marry. In Genesis, Tamar is first mentioned when she married Judah's oldest son named Er. That marriage was short lived as her husband dies due to his wickedness and Tamar was left widowed and childless. According to tradition, Tamar would then be married to the next oldest son to create children/heirs for her deceased husband. So she was married to Onan, who had no interest in creating any children as they wouldn't be 'his' to claim and so he would pull out before of Tamar while having sex with her so that she couldn't get pregnant. Onan also died prematurely and soon Tamar was widowed and still childless... again. Tradition would have her married to the next brother (whose name is Shelah), however, Judah is portrayed as being pretty wary at this point. Wondering if Tamar is cursed, he feels reluctant to promise his youngest son and so he tells Tamar that she must wait until Shelah reaches manhood. Tamar, having little choice in the matter, waits and even after Shalah is grown and Judah himself becomes a widower, she is still waiting. It becomes clear that Judah wasn't willing to risk his last heir but marrying him to her.

The writer doesn't mention how long it takes Tamar to realize that Judah never intends to follow through on his word and that she is trapped in a perpetual circle. She is back with her family waiting to return to her new family... yet she has little to no status in her new family heirarchy as she is widowed, alone and childless. Unable to marry anyone else to change her situation and yet betrothed but alone, she makes a really interesting and brave gamble. When her father in law, Judah, is headed to a different town for business, she dresses up and sits by the city gates, suggesting by this positioning and environment that she is a prostitute. It is thought that she had knowledge that he had sometimes used prostitutes at that area and as the women would wear veils to disguise their identity, that could help her do so as well. Things apparently went according to her plan and her offer was accepted. Judah didn't have any money so after the services were rendered he offered to send her a goat from his flock. As a pledge, she accepted his staff and his personal seal which were items that were of great worth to him. Later, when a friend of Judah's comes with the goat to make payment and exchange, no one could find the prostitute. Tamar had gone home to her family and had no told anyone around the area who she was and didn't tell her family what she had done. So Judah kept the goat and didn't say anything about it so that he could hide his embarrassment as well as the sin.

Some months later it became apparent that Tamar was pregnant... an unacceptable condition for an unmarried woman during that time. When the news of her pregnancy makes its way to Judah, in his anger and his position as the tribal leader, accuses her of 'playing the whore' and sentences her to death for her adultery (Even though she is currently unmarried, she is still betrothed to Shelah so her actions would be considered adultery... as well as the actions of her partner.) When Tamar learns of her sentence, she appeals to Judah giving him his staff and seal and letting him know that the 'owner' of them is her 'partner'. In his words, “She hath been more righteous than I; because that I gave her not to Shelah, my son” - Genesis 38:24 Realizing his culpability as well as his potential difficulties, Judah admits his guilt and he acknowledges the appropriateness of Tamar's behavior. She later gives birth to twin boy who are named Perez and Zerah.

I find many things about this story interesting to think about. One thing is something I mentioned before. Why is this particular story including in the book and was considered important enough to write down in the first place. The only characters that are consistent in the story (or at least survive through it) are Tamar, Judah and Shelah. Judah is one of Joseph's brothers (the Joseph who was sold by his brothers and send to Egypt) and the leader of his own tribe. He was married and he had children with her. Judah chose Tamar to be the wife of his oldest son Er so he, in theory, knew a bit about her and her family. What we know about her family is that she was probably not Jewish as she in not listed or named as a descendant of Abraham, Isaac or Jacob. Tamar can be seen as a women of integrity doing all she can to follow the cultural rules of her tribe and and Levirite law. She could have either married into a different family or simply stayed a widow. However, she could also have been seen as a co-conspirator with both of her dead husbands and therefore, immoral. Her choice to follow the 'higher' law as set by God and to try and create an heir for Er was risky and dangerous to her reputation as well as her life, but did end up working out for her. In fact, her son Perez gives her not only blessings (and is mentioned in the story of Ruth later in the book), but Perez makes her a direct descendant of King David and part of the Messianic line to Jesus Christ himself. Some people have suggested that the story of Judah and Tamar is put in the scriptures to emphasize how good Joseph was in comparison to his siblings. This story even seems to suggest that Tamar herself was more loyal to the tribe of Judah than he was himself.

Another thought is I really wonder how Tamar was able to pull off the trick. Judah helped pick her for his first son as a wife, married her to his second son who then dies, and was concerned enough about her potential to cause harm to his last son that he risked the wrath of God, etc to not keep his word on the betrothal. His quick temper and enthusiasm to accuse her of adultery and sentence her to death without really talking or doing any research on it suggests to me fear of her as well as anger. So it begs the question: how did he not recognize her... even dressed as a prostitute and not a widow? Can any of you when thinking of the people in your family contemplate the mistake he made? How could he possible not recognize something- voice, movement... anything? I guess I find that stunning and semi- unbelievable.

I also wonder how Tamar felt through all of this. Did she love Er...? Since her marriage was arranged, were they friends, tentatively polite...? How did she feel about marrying her brother in law... and his treatment of her? Heck, what if she loved her first husband and afterward had to deal with her grief and changed circumstances while marrying a man she did have feelings for.... or worse, didn't like at all. Certainly his treatment of her if she did want a child must have been hurtful and frustrating. Then Onan died and here she was alone again... back with her family and childless.

Then the waiting, watching Shelah grow up and imaging her potential life with him... and then realizing it wasn't going to happen. I wonder how long it took her to come to that conclusion and the mixed emotions that came with that.... When she made her plan to prostitute herself to Judah, was it a happy plan.? She didn't really have any way of knowing for sure that it would be successful and end in pregnancy? Would she have been willing to do that more than once...? Did she do that more than once? If nothing else, she must have had some decent acting skills. :) What a painful and challenging set of circumstances for anyone. Some versions of the story suggest she was celibate for the rest of her life while other versions suggest she lived with Judah as his wife and together they raised the twins... how did that work for her in either situation? Were her children worth it for her? Does she have regret for any of this?

So, why do you think this story is in the scriptures? What do you feel or like about this story? Do you feel like you learn anything when reading it? What do you think of Tamar? What might you have done in her place?

What Does Your Scripture Case Say About You?

For those of you who are highly religious, the idea of a scripture case may not be a new thing for you. Especially for members of the Mormon church who tend to carry and utilize often a set of four books; The Holy Bible- King James version, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants and the smallest... the Pearl of Great Price. When you have a few books to carry around, it doesn't take too long before you look for or buy something to carry them in and many people – myself included- carry them in a case specifically made for this purpose. These cases come in a variety of sizes, colors, and sometimes come with pockets, other accessories, etc... As every individual is unique, cases come with a variety of looks as they are decorated, sewn, or even embroidered as designed by the specific individual. And as I was sitting in church last Sunday, I was looking at the contents of my scripture case and marveling at the amount of stuff in it besides my scriptures. After taking some time to carefully go through the case, I thought and tried to discover what someone might think about me if they didn't know me... and only had my scripture case to look at for clues to my life and history.

The largest item in my scripture case is – not surprisingly my scriptures! :) I have all four books combined into one book which many members called a 'quad'. It is black and has my name embossed on the front. It is however, my maiden name, and so it gives no clue of my marriage at first blush. My scriptures have been marked in places with pencil as well as many different colors of waxed crayon and so that will probably confuse some poor soul in the future who tries to figure out what the different colors mean. Funny thing, but with very few exceptions... I used the color I picked up first when I was thinking about the scripture or the color that the verse caused me to think of at that moment. Certainly a lot of time can be wasted on attempting to classify and figure out what method there was to my color choices when there was very little structured method at all. My scriptures have a few different book marks in them and I took them out for this exercise as each means a great deal to me. This particular set of scriptures itself means a great deal to me because I purchased it only a few weeks before my husband proposed and he came into the distribution center with me while I picked them out. I found out later that he knew he was going to propose but wasn't sure how to tell me not to put my name on them as I might change it. :)

The next item is my hymn book. The same day I purchased my scriptures there was a small blue hymn book in the clearance section and I purchased it and had my name embossed on it as well. So it also has my maiden name, but pretty much no markings at all. In some ways it almost looks like I haven't used it at all, but it is my preferred hymn book for use at home and church if possible. Even though it is small and the lettering is small enough that it can be difficult to read, I feel more open to hearing the words when I hold it and sing from it. Nothing that I can really explain- just the way that I feel which may not be apparent without seeing me and watching me with the book

itself. Inside the hymnal, I have a small bookmark and two pictures. I use the book mark to hold the place of the next hymn during church or to mark the one that I am studying in my spare time and it was made for me as a present by my friend Toni. I haven't seen her in years, but I think of her every time I hold the bookmark and feel the caring and love that she has for me. The two pictures are very meaningful to me and I use them as a reminder of situations or people. The first picture is of a friend of mine when she graduated

from college. Katey looks beautiful, elegant and self assured. Her life has been a little different from mine and I aspire to look so calm, confident and beautiful when I finally graduate... well, if I finally graduate! ; ) The second picture is of Bug when he was about eighteen months old. The picture caught caught him in a rare moment of quizzical amusement and giggles.... and it was wonderful!

I have a few typical things- the package of scripture markers, two copies of the “New Testament” Chronology card (not sure why I have two...?), a large postcard with a picture of the scene of Lehi's dream, the Relief Society proclamation bookmark, and a pressed daisy that I have had for several years. The daisy is my favorite flower and it came from a bouquet that Rob bought me a long time ago. I also have two 4” x 7” pictures tucked into the pages. The first picture is of a portrait painted by David Lynn called “The Ascent.” The first time I say the artwork was in a museum in Utah. It took my breath away and off and on for weeks, I dreamed about the image. I saw the people in the portrait struggling forward, reaching out, pulling people up.... I felt their hands help me forward and I felt the hope in the struggle. We are not alone in our trials, we can always find help and support. Later on I found a copy of the picture on line and downloaded it to my computer. Then, after a trip with a thumb drive to the local drug store, I had my own small copy. I look at it at least once a week and I see different things, but I always feel a sense of peace and comfort while gazing. The last picture ironically enough gives me the same feelings, but its an entirely different subject matter. It a postcard photo that I made from a picture on the internet.

I am a serious Harry Potter fan and I was a very silly fan of Hermione and her group “S.P.E.W.” I loved to read about it and I spent a lot of free time in my life thinking about the questions that her group posed as well as the opposition she accidentally created in her zeal and struggle against the social norm. The lessons that I learned and ruminated on from some of the elf characters themselves; Winky, Dobby, and Creature. So I carry a picture of all three of them and the emblem of the group. I look at the picture and laugh at some of the images the characters create in my mind... Dobby wearing too many hats, Creature cooking or huddled over his picture of Bellatrix Lastrange, Winky crying and looking through her fingers.... so many images that create laughter or concern or other thoughts. For some reason that only my subconscious seems to understand, my scriptures and scripture study feels enriches with my picture of the elves. I actually don't feel terribly comfortable with the idea of taking it out of the case... that's something I might need to think about.

So what do you keep with your scriptures...? And what do the things you keep say about you? I'm curious... :)