Term Post #1 : Freedom of Speech, Censorship and the Role they play in Genocide

“Language is not only a means for exposing and discerning truth, but also for stifling and misrepresenting it.”

Human beings have been around on this planet for thousands of years and from what we know of the history of the human race, murder and genocide has accompanied our existence from the very beginning. Depending on your particular viewpoint of our beginnings (whether we have been 'created' or purely evolved from one celled organisms in a primordial ooze), the first murder was either committed within the second generation of God's chosen people or the first genocide is theorized by some paleontologists/ archeologists to have occurred between early humans (Homo sapiens) and Neanderthals back near the very beginnings of our race. The pages of written history are spattered with the blood and deaths of the innocent and those who were in the way of those in power due to race, culture, gender, religion or even misperception... and even in our modern, civilized world, we still perform crimes and acts against humanity as a whole destroying the peace and prosperity that we all long for. Over the last two hundred years as ways of communication have increased and information and news has become available to a larger percentage of the global population, historians and journalists have tried to appropriately document and report on the transgressions of government leaders and dictators. As such,these individuals are most likely to find themselves on the wrong side of governments and those in power. They are more likely to be bullied or tortured into silence, forced to help with propaganda campaigns to ensure their survival, and many are killed or imprisoned every year. In our current world, we can more easily discover these horrors and fight them, but it would be remiss of me to not acknowledge that people have risked their lives throughout the human time line to try and stop human rights violations. While most we will never know due to the lack of documentation and the time that has passed, we can acknowledge and be grateful for their sacrifices and existence. For many human rights advocates, language is one of their most commonly used weapon to share information, to bring violations to light, and to strengthen others in the fight and their cause. I wish to acknowledge some of the people who have given of their time, safety and freedom to future their ideals of freedom and safety for all.

It is my intention to take this opportunity to look at how leaders and dictators use government and armies to achieve their own ends while using the law and other forms of coercion to stifle and limit dissent or challenges to their ambition. One tool that governments and those in power use to restrain communication between individuals and the population at large is censorship. This a great tool which is used to limit language and ideas that the powers that be disagree with and restrict the ability for people to speak freely about their thoughts, lives and opinions. It is through the use of censorship and the limiting of freedom of speech that dictators and leaders control large population of people who feel oppressed and dissatisfied with life... and in some cases can eventually lead to genocide.

Freedom of speech and the ability to safely express opinions and views are widely considered to be a fundamental attribute of individual freedom. In the United States, James Madison argued at the very beginning of the colonies' development that government acts restricting speech and open debate were fundamentally wrong- yet it hasn't stopped other government officials or people in authority from attempting to control or limit speech that they find difficult or unacceptable and this pattern of repression continues into our current culture. While some laws restricting speech can be seen as reasonable- laws banning hate speech or allowing criminal responsibility for some forms of speech are an example, others can be seen as restricting and limiting of speech that should be protected and allowed. Examples from 1965 and today show how some patterns of repression continue even as leaders and times change. In 1965, John and Mary Beth Tinker were told that they were not allowed to wear black armbands in school as a statement against the American interference in Vietnam; their rights to do so were affirmed by the Supreme Court later on in Tinker vs Des Moines. In 2012, a school banned their cheerleaders from using positive, religious messages on their banners.... and a court again upheld the student's rights to free speech and expression. Determining the boundaries of where free speech should be curtailed have been debated since the idea came to fruition and even laws banning certain forms of hate speech can be seen as stifling legitimate views and expressions. As Charles Levendosky once opined, “One man's hate speech is another man's political statement. And political commentary has – and should have- the highest First Amendment Protection.” John Stuart Mill, who wrote a publication titled Essay on Liberty, stated “Strange it is, that men should admit the validity of the arguments for free discussion, but object to their being “pushed to an extreme”; not seeing that unless the reasons are good for an extreme case, they are not good for any case.” Another related tool that those in authority use to control speech and ideas that they find distasteful is censorship; the control of verbal or pictorial speech by individuals or groups or manipulating what information people can receive and share as well as keeping information secret. To have a truly open and prosperous society, individuals need to have the ability to seek, receive and give out information to others. Censorship can be in seen in small ways such as when libraries remove or ban a book so that it cannot be used by patrons due to content.... to something as big and convoluted as the internet filtering that some states impose on its citizens such as Iran and China. Used together, governments or leaders can severely restrict and limit how people interact with their community, families and other groups.... even how they feel about life and where they live and the level of fear and anxiety they feel in their daily lives. There is some evidence that over time people begin to self censor themselves which potentially suppresses not only the ideas and expressions of the individual, but also those that surround that person- family, community, etc...

Unearthing and examining the history of different countries with a focus on how limited speech and effective censorship can not only cause a 'chilling' effect on people, but also potentially lead to human rights abuses and genocide is difficult the further back in time we travel. Many written records from our past were created by the victors of wars and conquests and so all documents that were written and survive to this day (with few exceptions) were written and distributed by those in power and therefore, not necessarily truthful or accurate. Perception is everything and we gain our views, ideas, and biases from our experiences, the people around us, and our environment... which is why censorship and limiting speech works so well, as the less input we have, the less information we have to develop our views in a well rounded way. It is easier for dictators to steer our thoughts/ actions and easier to convince people of the lack of humanity in others without the full ability to question the information coming at you if what input you get in controlled and focused on the message you want people to agree with. It is this process which eventually leads to propaganda, the process of combining different forms of communication to try and influence people and groups towards one viewpoint. It usually only shares one view of the position and along with censorship, suppresses alternative views and discourages inquiries challenging the stated position. And so, many of the documents that are available to historians can be seen as propaganda or, at the minimum, a limited view of the discussed topic.... one of the reasons that history can 'change' over time as more facts or perspectives are discovered. As M.C. Beaton once wrote, “The way propaganda works as any schoolboy knows is that if you say the same thing over and over again, lie or not, people begin to believe it.” And historians can be caught up in the same web as they try to separate fact from fiction and other altering viewpoints while governments and those in power try and restrict what information is available and how it is viewed. There is some evidence that governments have in some cases destroyed or culled materials from their records and archives to keep it from potentially being viewed and dissected even in our more modern and 'enlightened' times. When confronted with censorship, historians and the everyday individual must decide whether to collaborate with the government, impose censorship onto themselves, or resist and leave themselves open to persecution. These are important viewpoints to keep in mind when studying history, large groups, governments, leaders, etc...

So, how do the combination of limiting speech and the freedom of expression lead to crimes against humanity or genocide...? There are so many examples in the course of human events to chose from (unfortunately). The examples I have chosen vary due to location, culture, and the facts. However, they also have a few things in common; those in power either didn't share important information or made specific decisions knowing the harm they would cause, people allowed themselves to become focused on the differences that they disliked in other groups, censorship and limited speech as well as the use of propaganda were used to further their desires and to attempt to limit the knowledge and discussion of the consequences of their decisions. I also specifically choose examples that I had heard briefly mentioned during my studies or my fun readings over the courses of my lifetime so that I could take the opportunity to not only learn more about the transgressions and the aftermath, but also to try and understand how they came to be. I also recognize that some of my choices are not free of controversy, that full documentation does not exist and that even the term genocide may be questioned by both scholars and the lay historian today. Therefore, the examples I have chosen are the Irish Genocide also known as the Irish Potato Famine and the Holodomar in the Ukraine.


Thoughts so far...?

Ethical Concerns for Providers when Dealing with Refugee Populations

There is no doubt that mental health professionals and other service providers can help alleviate the effects of trauma, torture and other crimes that are perpetrated against people and communities due to circumstances, religion, war, etc... Throughout this class, I have learned quite a bit about the consequences to both individuals and groups based on trauma/ torture and have even broadened my views of how those terms should be defined. Between therapies that are individualized or set up for groups (such as a family, community or people with the same traumas and problems in common) and interactions that attempt to alleviate suffering through the use of medical training, pharmaceuticals, neurobiological or cognitive therapies, etc... Many groups and professional have been focused on – and continue to try- to help victims and the society as a whole heal, develop techniques for survival and daily care, as well as trying to improve the quality of health and life of those affected. However, there can be challenges as well as ethical problems that the mental health / medical provider can face in these situations.

One challenge can come in the form of using pharmaceuticals to help the patient deal with some of the symptoms that cause difficulty in their lives. While studies do suggest that medication makes a bigger impact on an individual's symptoms, the issue is not that black and white. How the patient and/or their family feels about medical care in general (or mental health medication specifically) has an effect on how the medication is used and therefore, how successful it can be. An individual's culture may also weigh into the decision to use medical treatments/ medicine of any kind. And how the services are provided might also affect the utilization of those services. Language, economics, and other barriers can cause misunderstandings and challenges as well. A perfect example of this problem can be found in the book, “The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down” written by Anne Fadiman. An amazing and very sad biography.

Another thing that is very important for the provider to acknowledge and understand is that the trauma itself may be what the provider wishes to treat and focus on... but the provider is still treating a person. An individual with different perceptions, biases, experiences and other ways of seeing and moving through the world. And so while trying to treat the troublesome symptoms of the past trauma, it is imperative that the person being treated isn't seen in the narrow sense as a label or a diagnosis. The patient needs to be viewed and looked at in the 'prism' of their views and life... so recommendations and therapies need to be available to the patient in a way that fits their current set of circumstance and needs. I thought of an experience in my life when I had a few sick animals who lived with me and my family in a one room yurt. The vet said that one cat needed to be fed a special food, another cat needed a different special food and the other cats couldn't eat either food. When I mentioned that I lived in one room, I was told to deal with it. I did figure out a solution that worked, but it took a while and I didn't use the resources that had been offered nor have I been back to that clinic. I probably would have felt differently and used the resources offered if the provider had made them seem possible. Just a thought on that topic.... So making sure that the resources used are more helpful than stressful and really address the 'whole person' are needed. That takes more time and energy as well as an understanding of an an attempt to put your own biases, etc... aside. That is a bit difficult to do for most of us. :) Also making sure that the resources are available to use in a way that works for the client makes them more likely to be utilized and more likely to help the patient with lasting change in their lives... which is the goal!

Another important element – which I touched on in the last paragraph is to make sure that a thorough understand of the person and their culture are attained. By understanding what is important to the individual and what they use to not only make decisions but base most of what is important in their life on.... the suggestions and recommendations that are given by the mental health providers are more likely to not only be followed but misunderstandings are more likely to be caught quickly and early in the process. That helps develop the trust relationship between the provider and the patient as well as help the patient to work harder to help themselves because not only does it matter to them as individuals, the provider has shown that it matter to them too. (Aren't we all more likely to accomplish our goals when we have a friendly goal 'buddy'?) So by having decent understanding of the background and viewpoint of the patient, the service providers can make fewer but more meaningful referrals and help keep the patient on task. An example is not suggesting a patient with PTSD have an occasional drink to relax but maybe a cookie or a walk with a friend instead. If the culture sees nightmares and terrors as a curse from God that must be overcome.... then they are much less likely to take the Ambien to sleep nor will their family encourage them to do so. Telling an individual to eat pork or stop smoking for their health when smoking is part of their religious practices or the eating of pork is against their beliefs will either cause total noncompliance or partial uncompliance as the patient will only do it when they feel pressed to do so or have another compelling reason to do so. It is important that the clinician recognizes what his values are and recognize when he is potentially pushing values and cultural norms on the patient and not actual treatment. I know those examples are not mental health related, but I thought they did help me make the point I was attempting to make. :)

Another thing that it is imperative that mental health providers think about when dealing with challenged and refugee populations is to follow the information and tools that have work in the past as evidenced by studies and their own observations and life experience, but to also recognize that the current work that is being done can give good insights into potential therapies simply because if it appears to be currently working, with so few good studies out there.... if every is in agreement to try something new... that has the potential to help victims now as well as future populations. This kind of flexibility to look outside the box but also to be cautious and thoughtful about trying therapies that haven't had a lot of use and study is a challenging but needed trait in these providers. It is also this flexibility that allows the clinician to look at the individual in a well rounded way, and not just the way that they have been taught to see certain symptoms or mental distress.

Lastly, it is important that the clinician recognize and maintain clear boundaries between themselves and their patients so that both parties can work together for improvement and satisfaction. When the boundaries are loosened, both parties may find it very challenging to continue to work together and to work towards progress in the manner that was possible when the division between the two was clearly laid out. Providing services that also allow the individual to have privacy not only from strangers who do not have a legitimate need to know their information, but also family can also help the patient by making things clearer and less likely to be misunderstood through another person's biases and thoughts mixing into the mix. An example could be when the parties involved have a language barrier – a translator from outside the patients inner circle may make a different translation that a family member or a friend who may interpret what the patient is saying or needs based on what they think the patient needs... not quite the same thing. This kind of translation can also compromise a patient's need and right for confidentiality making services more challenging for them to get and undermining the trust needed between the patient and the provider. The provider must also to make sure to care for and recognize problems that may crop up with themselves from working with this population and take care to not allow themselves to become burned out or harmed in the process of helping others... which can cause them to be unable to continue to help or even to cause more trauma to the patient.

To be a provider to such a challenged population comes with both risks and rewards for the clinician and the patients. Understanding the important ethical concerns that should be addressed can help everyone involved do a better job, be safer, and to help people gain more resiliency and a better quality of life through the therapies. What more can we ask for? :)

“Wings” and What Not.... :D

So this week, I was able to watch most of a remastered film called “Wings”. It was a 1927 American action silent film (all words were written in borders) that starred Clara Bow, one of the great early actresses of film. The film was an original black and white, silent film w/ dramatic narration and some remastered affects that had been added (such as the orange, red plums form the back of disabled planes crashing to earth.) While this film was mostly based on war – WWII in particular, it had several aspects of the script and directing that I found interesting and worthy of analyzing and extra thought.

Clara Bow mentioned once that she felt she was put in the film because she was the studio's most popular actress and that the film didn't need her... but I will say that I loved her in the film and I'm not sure the film would have had the same 'open' flavor that I felt it had with her in it. To be blunt, I don't think it would have been at all enjoyable for me without her in it. It was her expressions and her feelings toward the character Jack Powell that actually drew me into the film and caused me to have interest in the film at all. Clara played a character called Mary Preston who found it very challenging to hide her feelings and love for Jack Powell. Jack was very attracted to another girl named Sylvia Lewis, but Sylvia is in love with a boy named David Armstrong. The boy's rivalry follows them when they both enlist in the Army to be fighter pilots and only after some tension do both David and Jack find a way to get along and become friends. The movie plot follows these two young men through the war as well as Mary Preston and how the war changed them. I highly recommend taking the time to watch it if you have the inclination.

One of the acting techniques that silent films needed to use in the past to help the viewers understand the plot of the film was to use written narration. When parts of the plot needed to move along faster, a little music and some written words could not only change the scene but also lets us as an audience know exactly how everything had changed- environment, situation, etc... In our current media, much of what we use to help move plot and emotion along is words. Films also use body language and facial expression, but words and sound really matters. Many films use sound and facial expression to help us to realize the thoughts of the characters we are watching. This film being soundless had only two options to let the audience know what was going on- the narration and the music... or the body language and facial movements. Pantomime is a wonderful skill and I felt like the written language in the film wasn't very useful to me... I felt pulled into the story through every movement on the character's faces. These actors used everything they had to express what was in their head and I felt like I could understand the words that that were said – even though I couldn't hear them- I could understand just from their faces and their eyes. Most of the emotions / thoughts that I could feel coming from the actors that helped me to understand what was going on seemed to come from directly from their eyes. At one point I found myself staring at Clara Bow and felt pulled in... sucked into her frustration and sorrow over Jack, fear for his safety and excitement over her new opportunity to drive which opens up her world a bit more. That skill- it is definitely a skill- is something that most actors these days can't (or at least don't) do. I wouldn't be at all unhappy if I found some time to finish the film outside of class. :)

So what silent films have you seen? Do you have a favorite? If you have watched this film, what did you think about it. This was my first introduction to Clara Bow and I would love to watch more things that she starred in. I felt like she was that good! Please share your thoughts... :)

Early Russia: Thoughts on Christianity, Women and Language

As with any beginning country-state, there are many things that influence or change the way(s) it develops and grows through time. Early Russia is no different than any other country in this regard. What makes it different from many of the countries surrounding it was that its beginning could be influenced by different groups that did not exist a thousand years earlier... while many of the surrounding areas did and had been populated for thousands of years. Russia is a very different member of our modern European community in part because of its late start as a country; like a brilliant child, it is quickly catching up to its 'elders', but has had to continue to make the early steps of statehood that so many countries had made hundreds of years before early Russia existed. So Russia was able develop its own early traditions of Christianity and woman’s roles, somewhat separate from the traditions that had developed in other countries and had existed for generations. And Russia developed its own language apart from the language of other countries setting it apart in many ways from the lands that surrounded it. It is these particular influences on early Russia that I will discuss in this paper.

The early Russian people were devotees of pagan thought. An early document called The Primary Chronicle ascribes the beginning of Christianity in Russia to the Ruler Vladimir I in the year 988AD. Giving up as a bad job the attempt to strengthen paganism with his subjects, he looked at a few of the other world religions and chose Christianity... which he then began to 'invite' the elite and others in his country to join. The 'Chronicle' gives some hints as to why Christianity was chosen over other large faiths of that time and credits his rejection of Islam to 'circumcision and abstinence from pork and wine were disagreeable to him' and the idea that a religion that did not allow drinking would not be tolerated by his people. It has been suggested that Vladimir rejected Judaism on the grounds that as the Jews no longer had control of Jerusalem, this was evidence that they had been abandoned by God. While all of the former reasons may have been legitimate and true, they do not appear to be the only reasons for Vladimir's choice... and a strange choice it truly was for a man who had heard of Christianity several years earlier and remained a pagan, collecting hundreds of concubines, several wives and was known for a short time as a persecutor of believers of the Christian faith. (On a side note, Vladimir's grandmother had converted to Christianity in 957 and had missionaries sent to Kievan Rus with very little success.) Another reason- and might have been the most truthful or most compelling reason- was a reason that had clear political consequences and ties. As Europe was becoming more Christian, it might have occurred to Vladimir that his fortunes and commercial trade would be affected with other Christian nations. However, an easily documented reason may have had to do with forming alliances. Basil, the emperor of the neighboring Byzantine Empire asked his enemy Vladimir I for help in putting down a civil rebellion which was then given by Vladimir. The condition was that Vladimir could marry Basil's daughter if he (Vladimir) converted to Christianity. This would cement the alliance between the early Russian state and the Byzantine empire and would also open more trade routes and opportunities for economic advancement.

So, whatever the reason for the conversion of Vladimir I to Christianity, he took to it faithfully and appears to have made immediate and continued insistence of the spread and following of Christian membership and values throughout his lifetime. He tried to stamp out idols, invited beggars to the palace to be given food, drink and money if needed and had to be persuaded some churchmen to be more harsh with criminals as lawbreaking became rampant. He also championed the building of church buildings and education – although the children of the elite were the recipients of his education promotion. On his death, his body was dismembered and made into 'relics' for the church and he was eventually sainted by the Greek Orthodox Church.

Women in early Russia were seen in a slightly different light than the ways that women were seen in other European states at the time. While they were still very limited in their rights, women in early Russia did enjoy more protections and in some cases a greater status than their counterparts in Europe. Before Christianity was brought or 'forced' upon Russia, the majority of individuals living in the Kievan Rus believed in paganism. This belief system comes with deities of both sexes and both gods and goddesses were worshiped and treated with awe and fear. A few of the goddesses that would have been worshiped during this time would have been Paraskeva (who is associated with Mother Earth and her bounty), Mokosh (a fertility/childbirth goddess), Vesnianka (the personification of spring), Zorya Vechernyaya (the goddess of the setting sun.), Makosha (the goddess of fate and good/bad fortune), and numerous other powerful spirits such as the rusalki (known as water and tree nymphs). Women during these times could have known some fairly tough times. While goddesses were revered, earthly women could count on the likelihood of being raped, seized to force marital relations, and partners in polygamy. They would also be taught to understand that the husband is the head of the household and they were to be submissive. There are some instances that suggest that at least some noble women were not forced to marry against their will by their parents as well as a story in The Primary Chronicle about a 'forceful' princess who ruled for a short time. A pagan belief system in short allows for some better thoughts about women because it is polytheistic-unlike Christianity which is monotheistic and very much male-centric. To worship and revere nature was to revere a female goddess... and not a male. Christianity would bring some new rights for women, but would also take away some of the positive ways that women had been viewed.

So women in early Russia had changing roles over time and how women were viewed could change their status in society. In the pagan society, women could be treated physically quite roughly, but could enjoy a status of protection and even an elevation in status if her family had good fortune- class was not as rigidly enforced in these times. As the country became Christian, the church's views on women and sex became more dominant. Pious women were seen as good and the church encouraged the appropriate treatment of widows as well as treating the members of your family correctly, not forcing daughters to marry and opposed bride capture and polygamy. However, church legal procedures could be more punitive to women in some instances and the fear of women and their sexuality, charm, and ability to cause men to sin was a high focus of the church when women were discussed. The fact that women were prohibited from attending church due to menstruation or childbirth shows that the church did put unnecessary limits on women and feared them- marking them as 'unclean' during certain times... which is equated to sin. In Russian society outside of church, women were given rights in civil law- although those rights were many for the upper class. However, upper class women could inherit and own moveable property including her dowry, run or take care of her deceased husband's estate and her children could not refuse to give her the portion due to her from her husband's will. At first, a woman's movable property would consist of household items and personal effects, but would eventually come to encompass money and then land. And while women could own property, it had to be specifically given to them. Women could lost their property for the failings and debts of a husband, but the law was not interpreted in the same way for men. Church law in many cases superseded secular law and the church was responsible for matters of rape, adultery, divorce, witchcraft, etc...

Around Europe, Russian women were known for their beauty, knowledge and power. Russian upper class women and in some cases men were educated more often than their European counterparts. One example was the daughter of Yaroslav I named Anna who married the French King Henry I- at the wedding she could sign her name on the certificate, while the king himself could only sign an X. She later functioned as a regent for her son Philip I of France. Several of Anne's sisters married European Catholic monarchs as well. In the 900's the country was ruled by a woman named Olga, who is said to have avenged her husband's death and was also regent for her son for a few years - she is the Christian grandmother of Vladimir I mentioned above. She was also the first women to be canonized by the Orthodox Church. A wife of the “Grand Prince of Russia” could sometimes receive members of foreign embassies or ambassadors. So women did a fair share of the work that needed to be done, and upper class women brought influence, intrigue, and even scandal into many of the royal houses in Europe as well as Russia.

When Russia began to become a Christian nation under the rule of Vladimir I, written language was 'borrowed' from the same empire who brought Christianity. The Cyrillic alphabet was brought to Kievan Rus along with Christianity in the tenth and eleventh centuries by the followers of Saint Cyril and Saint Methodius, who invented the first Slavic alphabet in the ninth century. This alphabet was a written language that was close to the spoken language in the Rus lands and so by the time Christianity reached Kievan Rus, many books had already been translated into this handy and easier to learn language. This language became known as Old Church Slavic. The influence of Byzantine literature, culture and of course Christian works served to help move the church in quickly- all the documents and books were now in a common adopted language. The church also helped build schools for education and brought in a new culture/art that was fairly easily assimilated. Yaroslav I (also known as Yaroslav the wise and is the son of Vladimir I) helped facilitate this language and used it to write the first East Slavic written legal code called the 'Russkaya' Pravda.

The information that I was privileged to study while researching this paper did leave me with some questions that I have been unable to answer. For instance I am very curious as to what happened to the wives and concubines of Vladimir I. Very few sources that I was able to find alluded to the four wives before Anna (his wife from the alliance to the Byzantine empire) and their lives after Vladimir's conversion- they simply state that they were 'put away'. Another source suggests that the wives and the concubines were put away 'according to tradition'- doesn't say what that was however. One source shows the difficulty of even understanding who the mothers of Vladimir's children were. Nothing mentions these concubines and what happened to them. Were they not important enough to 'put away'? I wonder how many of these women found themselves in very hard times throughout the rest of their lives simply because Vladimir 'changed his mind'. I wonder how many of these women felt forced into becoming concubines... and were then forced out? Also, finding information on any women during this time frame was really difficult and I would be curious to know how women in towns lived vs. rural life and how their roles changed depending on the environment around them. I also would be interested to know what life was life for Anna of Kiev to be more educated than most individuals around her in the court in France. I can imagine that increased her power in some ways, but also might have made things quite difficult and she might have been 'left out' of things. Maybe someday I can have the time to continue to try and find answers to these questions that puzzle me. But until then, enjoy the read :).

French, Anyone?

I have decided to make an attempt to learn French. I need to stress that this will be a tiny attempt. In my short past, I have found the attempt to learn a language to be something that is an impossibility to me- like math. No matter how hard I try, I have not been successful. Its almost like I have a mental block that tells me I can't do it... so therefore I live up to that idea and I am truly unable to do it. I feel a little uncomfortable with that idea though; the idea that something that is perfectly possible in impossible for me. I am intelligent, kind, motivated, and determined. There is no rational reason that I can come up with that I cannot learn a language. And I loved my time in Paris and I am interested in moving to Canada... so...

Today I will try! I pledge to give five minutes at least four days a week to this goal. Not so much that I feel pressured, but enough to remind me of my goal and to learn a word and how to use it. And if I am really good... I will try to stick to appropriate words, although that doesn't sound like as much fun! :o)

So, if I want to try and do this without the help of my family because I am hoping it will be a pleasant surprise, does anybody else know of any good resources for learning the language? If you have learned a language before, what helped you the most? And please, what was not helpful to you? What advice would you give me?